I think sometimes we over-complicate things in marriage. I'm so glad we are doing this blog. It keeps things simple. I know there can be challenges in marriages that aren't this easy. But we need to be able to start somewhere that doesn't feel insurmountable. These things are a great start. 9. Help each other out
It's easy to get used to our routines and chores that we are in charge of. Sometimes in life our spouse may have a season that is more busy than others. In those times, it's important to seek ways we can help out our spouse. Or if we are the ones struggling, we need to ask for help. Our spouse cannot read our minds (as much as we would like that at times) so we need to speak up and ask.
10. Think of one of their pet peeves and be intentional not to do it.
How many things do we do that our spouse has complained about yet we keep doing it? Does it frustrate them when you leave your laundry in the middle of the floor? Or what about when you start nagging about the kids the minute they walk through the door from work. Do you even say hello first? If you know something irritates them, make an effort to not do it. Even if they don't notice, you can feel good that you are doing something to help your marriage. Sometimes we just don't notice things when they AREN'T happening. But you can feel good about it.
11. Do a daily check in regarding schedules
Check in daily with your spouse regarding what is going on for the day. Ask follow-up questions about how their activities went. For example, if you let your spouse know you have an important meeting, then they know to ask how that meeting went later in the day. Even a nice text for when they come out of the meeting can mean the world when things didn't go as planned. It lets your spouse know that you care about them and are thinking about them when you ask questions. But it's easier for them to ask questions when you share what's on the agenda (remember the whole mind-reading thing?) ;)
12. Be Optimistic
Try to think positive about things. Negative expectations will produce negative outcomes. Sometimes when we think negative we actually make it happen or convince ourselves it did happen when it actually didn't. Thinking positive keeps us in a positive frame of mind.
I hope these tips are simple for you. Try one a week and make it a habit before moving on to the next. In a month you might see some small changes. Lots of small changes lead to a big change. Tomorrow Joleen will give us 3 more tips. Thank you for reading and have a great day!
Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling. We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville