We will continue on with our unhelpful thinking habits today. If you haven't read the previous ones, definitely go back. They are worth your time in reading. Compare and dispair This is when we compare ourselves to everyone else, and we fall short. Everyone else looks like a supermodel to you, talks like a Harvard professor, and has chivalry and manners like Prince Charming. You, however, see yourself as a frumpy, plain Jane, feel inferior to anyone who can read, and see your manners as those of a 2 year-old! This could be a slight exaggeration. But the point is, you see good in other people and bad in yourself.
Catastrophising This is simple seeing the worst in situations. The toilet overflows and you start screaming about how horrible of a day it's going to be and that you'll be fired from your job! When in reality, you might be late and yes, the day will be challenging, but not earth shattering.
This is dangerous in relationships. We can feel like the smallest things are overwhelming and huge and place that on our partner or kids. It's important to keep our thoughts reeled in. Ask yourself questions like, "What is the worse that can happen? I might be late? Okay, I can handle that. I am only human."
Critical Self When you put yourself down, blame yourself for things that aren't totally your fault (or not at all), or when you are highly critical of yourself, you struggle with having a "Critical Self". It is like you have a constant monkey on your back criticizing every move you make as a person, employee or boss, a parent, or just being a human being! You take responsibility for things that you don't need to and get angry at yourself for making mistakes. This is a horrible way to live. It truly is like being in an abusive relationship with someone but it's yourself.
If you feel you struggle with one of the thoughts we are talking about this week, it is normal. But if you struggle with many of them, you may want to seek counseling to help. These thoughts can lead to anxiety, depression, difficult relationships, and honestly, a very challenging life.
Thank you for reading and we look forward to seeing you tomorrow.
Written by Natalie Chandler
Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling. We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville