This week we are focusing on what it means to "let go". This can help you with relationships, in your job, with your children, and many aspects of your life. So many things that we try to control are really not ours to control. But we try to control them anyway. Many of the things I will discuss today are related to things we can't control.
- When there is something we truly cannot change or do anything about, letting go is simply admitting to ourselves that we are "powerless" over the situation. This simply means the solution is not something you can do anything about and you have no control over it. So it's ok to quit trying to control it.
- When looking at our own situations, letting go is taking responsibility for what you CAN change and doing something about it, rather than trying to blame it on other people or trying to change them. It's to make the most of myself and what I can do rather than blaming others for things and feeling stuck because I can't control them.
- Letting go is learning to care about others but not taking care of them. When we believe that caring about someone means taking care of people, then they are robbed of the opportunity to learn to care for themselves. This also can translate to them as "I don't think you're smart enough or capable enough to take care of yourself". Even though we may feel we are doing it out of love, a different message can be conveyed.
- Letting go means being supportive to someone rather than telling them what to do. Have you ever gone to a friend, just needing them to listen and support you. How do you feel when they start giving you advice? It's feels invalidating and sometimes, disrespectful. You want to say, "I actually don't need you to tell me what to do. I am smart enough to figure that out on my own. I just really need support."
Hopefully you can see more ways of letting go, rather than just actually saying the words. There are multiple ways we hold on to things. Tomorrow, Joleen will share 3 more ways to let go. Thank you for reading.
Written by Natalie Chandler
Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling. We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville