We never like to see anyone going through a divorce but if it happens, we are so glad parents seek guidance on how to have the LEAST impact on kids. Inevitably, they will have challenges and struggles. But parents can lower the impact for kids if they know what they need to do and follow through. If you missed the beginning of the week, it will be worth your time to go back and catch up.
Tip #4 Reassure Your Children about the Basic Necessities
Kids need to know that in spite of all the changes- they are loved! Nothing will change the parents love for the children. Reassure them of this when you think it might be needed...and even when you think you've said it enough.
Kids also need to know their basic needs will be met. For example, money is talked about a lot during a divorce. Sometimes they wonder if they will have enough food to eat, clothes, or a place to sleep. If you know for sure they will be taken care of, let them know this. If you are not sure (sometimes divorce can lead to difficult financial situations) assure them that there might be changes, you will do everything you can to take care of them, and that you will always be together.
Whatever you do, don't fill them with false promises. As Teri mentioned Monday, this can lead to trust issues if you can't keep your word. Only tell them what you know will be true. Sometimes that means "I don't know. But we will be ok because we are going to work it out."
This is tough. All of it. But if you do your best to not put adult problems onto your kids, they will have less to worry about. Assure them they will be taken care of.
Tomorrow Joleen will finish with our last 2 tips. Thank you for reading today!
Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC LCAC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling. We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville