Christmas is coming up and many feel pressure to find the “perfect” gift. This week Imagine Hope is giving you tips on what to give based on your partner's needs. We all have needs in relationships, and it is important to know what those needs are so you can make sure you are loving your partner the way they need to feel loved.
Today we identify different needs your partner may have. Then you can keep reading all week for suggestions of gifts for Christmas that will really say “I love you” based on that need!
1. Saying kind words- People can feel loved just through simple words. This can include complimenting someone on their appearance, letting someone know how much you appreciate them, thanking them for things they do around the house, or ways in which they are helpful. This can be verbal or written.
2.Giving someone gifts- A gift is anything given to say “I was thinking of you". It's a visual symbol of love. Gifts can be purchased (small or large) or handmade. There’s also giving the gift of self. This is giving the gift of your presence (physically & emotionally), or in other words, being there for your significant other when they need you. For some individuals a gift has nothing to do with the monetary value, and everything to do with love and knowing you were thinking of them when you saw it.
3. Doing chores and helpful activities- Did you ever think you might be showing love to your partner by doing chores? The key is that your attitude is about doing it out of love, not out of obligation. Don’t assume any act will show love. If this is something you need in your relationship, make sure you teach your partner what this means to you and define the specifics around it.
4. Hugs, kisses and physical closeness- Many people get this need confused with sex. Yes, sexual intimacy is one part of it, however, it also includes holding hands, hugs, kisses, scratching their back, massage, and even just sitting next to each other…. anything that you are doing to be physically touching can meet this need.
5. Spending time together- This is focused and undivided time, where you go to the other persons emotional level to connect with them. Truly spending time together that is healthy and connected, means putting away technology, turning off the TV, and focusing exclusively on spending good, intimate time with your partner. It’s important to have direct eye contact, and listen with no distractions. This can also include fun activities full of bonding and laughter.
Were you able to figure out which one is a strong need for your partner?
Tomorrow check in for gift tips!
Written by Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC
Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC is a licensed therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Teri does virtual therapy for residents of Indiana and Florida using videoconferencing technology. Teri enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, couples and relationship counseling. Teri also does family counseling and adolescent counseling.