The beginning of relationships can feel like fireworks. The passion, the desire to see them and talk to them, and the drug like euphoria are all common parts of the enmeshment phase of a relationship. But how do you keep it going? We get asked this question daily at Imagine Hope. Of course life gets comfortable, conflict changes things, and the euphoria dies down a bit. This week we will share some simple ways to help your relationship have some of that spark again. Remember if you don't put the effort in, nothing will change!
Don't Stop Dating Each Other
Time together is vital to feeling close and connected. Remember the days when you would take the time to look nice, put on some good clothes, and go out together.
Just because you have been together for a long time and feel comfortable doesn't mean you should stop showing your partner your best and not go out together. Sit down and slow down your busy lives over a fun activity or nice meal. Having a date night several times a month will give you more opportunity to connect.
Make sure you both have a say so about what you do on your dates. Maybe take turns planning them. It's important that both of you feel fulfilled and you have a balance of fun and connection time.
Also come ready to SHARE more than just information exchange. Yes, the details of day to day life are important- but think about the deeper experiences that affect you in life (good and bad) and dig into some good conversation.
If money is a stressor, there are many free or low cost options. Get creative! Many younger people date on a tight budget and have fun- you can too! Don't make excuses here.
If you want fireworks, you have to put the time in to help create them. Date nights are an easy way to make that happen.
Check in tomorrow for more ideas to help your marriage regain that spark!
Written by Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC
Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC is a licensed therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Teri enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, couples and relationship counseling. Teri also does family counseling, child counseling, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area, including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Zionsville, and Westfield.