Remember that feeling you had when you began dating your partner? When we make special effort to romance our partner, they will know that we are interested in their happiness. Romance your partner like when you were dating! Sex is more fufilling for women when it about more than only physical release. Women are far more likely to respond to your sexual advances when they feel attractive, valued, and important. Romance is a wonderful way of communicating these sentiments. Male partners also feel more connected and engaged in sex when they feel wanted, valued, appreciated, and attractive. Even small romantic gestures go a long way to draw a couple together. Little things can be exciting like calling her in the middle of the day to tell her she looked nice this morning, or drop him a note at lunch time to let him know you can't wait for the kids to go to bed tonight!
Stress is the ultimate killer of sexual mojo. If you want your partner to be more engaged in sex, the worst thing to do is complain or attack your partner on his or her performance. If your partner is sexual with you out of fear, debt, or obligation, it will not be fufilling for either of you.
Relax! Don't put too much pressure on each other, but help your partner in kind encouraging ways. Communicate your desires safely always making sure that your partner hears you say that you love them enough to want to be intimate with them. If you do not like what your partner is asking you to do sexually, communicate that in a loving way. Let them know it is the act that you don't like, not that you don't like your partner. Talk about what you like and what you don't like. If there is something that your partner does really well, let them know that too! If your partner feels stressed about sex, they will likely not want to engage in it and neither will you.
Please continue to check in this week for more tips to make sex more fulfilling. As always, thanks for stopping by.
Written by Alexa Griffith, LMHC, LCAC, NCC, RPT
Alexa Griffith, LMHC, LCAC, NCC, RPT is a licensed therapist and Registered Play Therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Alexa enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, couples and relationship counseling. Alexa also does play therapy, family counseling, child counseling, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area, including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Zionsville, and Westfield