Last-Borns: Making Your Birth Order Work for You

As the pattern would follow for this week: Tamara writing on the 1st born and being one, Alexa being a middle child and writing about that- guess what I might be? Yes, the "BABY" as we are so often referred to! The Last-Born gets a wrap for being coddled and getting all the attention. This may be true but we also have a lot of great characteristics that come from this. Here are some things to remember if you are a last-born. Accept responsibility for yourself. It was easy to blame things on the older ones in the family, right? Not now as an adult. It's time to grow up and take responsibility for our own mistakes (and the good stuff, too!).

Think neat. If you are messy and disorganized, it's time to change that. Picking up after yourself will eliminate stress on you and for others who pick up after you.

Give of yourself. Being the center of attention can create selfishness. It's great to step out of yourself and think of ways to help others. Mow the neighbors yard without telling them it was you. Skip the need for accolades. Pay it forward to the person behind you in the Starbucks drive thru- buy their drink and drive away! Give money or time to a charity or organization. Think outside of "you".

Beware of being too independent. Notice when you are excluding others when you need help. Don't be too proud to ask for it. And when you do make a mistake, admit it. Don't try to blame others.

Always be aware of your gifts: being funny, charming, and persuasive. This can be negative or positive. Some people use this to manipulate people in a negative way. Use your charm as an asset to do good and to help others. Don't use it just to get attention.

Share the applause. Be aware of and ask about what is going on with other people. Be interested in others instead of always talking about yourself. And share the stage now and then. Others have talents and need to hear applause as well.

Before marriage, try dating firstborns. Firstborns will balance the relationship in that they like to take charge and be serious. If you are laid back and like to have fun, hopefully this will balance out and not create a ton of conflict.

There you have it first-borns. Tomorrow Joleen will finish us out with "Making the Birth Order Work". Thank you for reading and have a great day!

Source for the week: K. Leman “The Birth Order Book: Why You Are the Way You Are”

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville