Firstborns: Making Your Birth Order Work for You!

Oh how this week's blog is too true. I'm a first-born, and I can honestly say that the info below is dead-on. Hopefully if you are a first-born as well you'll be able to see the items below and relate:

  • Take smaller bites of life - First-borns get involved in too many things, leaving very little time for themself.
  • Work on saying "no" -  Most first-borns are pleasers - trying to get the approval of others by accepting the requests and invitations of other people. How do you put a stop to this? Know your limitations, and accept that having limitations are reasonable and human.
  • Lower your sights a bit - Because you are the first born in your family, your parents had great expectations for you, and you probably have great expectations for yourself as well. You expect to be the best, to be perfect to be first. Put those expectations aside and enjoy life. Do less and enjoy more.
  • Enjoy your natural curiosity - First-borns are known for asking alot of questions & wanting all the details. There's no need to apologize for this character trait of yourself. This is a sign of a leader who can see a situation, figure out what needs to be done, then apply the steps to logically solve the problem.
  • Take your time - Most first-borns are careful and cautious. If you need to take time making decisions, then do that. Don't let people pressure your process.
  • If you're serious, try to develop a sense of humor - Can you laugh at your mistakes? Be more accepting of your humanness and that you're going to fail now and then. If you don't make mistakes, how are you going to learn?
  • Don't apologize for being conscientious and over-organized - First-borns like structure and "to do" lists. The key is to have flexibility and not be run by the lists and structure.

Remember, the key is not to beat yourself up, but to make what's beautiful and wonderful about yourself WORK for yourself. And don't worry, if you're not a first-born, we have each birth order coming up and covered this week. Tomorrow Alexa will talk about being a middle-child. Thanks for reading!

Source for the week: K. Leman “The Birth Order Book: Why You Are the Way You Are”

Written by: Tamara Wilhelm MA, LMHC, LCAC

*Tamara enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, & couples counseling  at Imagine Hope. We also specialize in family counseling, child & adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area, including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Noblesville, Zionsville, Westfield & Fishers.