At Imagine Hope we spend endless hours teaching people HOW to communicate effectively. It is amazing how easy it is to fall into poor habits. This week we will help you see common trends people use that break down communication! Bad Communication Characteristics:
- Truth- Telling the truth is good to do when communicating, but believing that your stance is the only truth can be a problem. When you insist that you are "right" and the other person is "wrong", it prevents others from having opinions and feelings separate from you. This causes conversations to not feel safe to be open and honest. Instead keep an open mind that it's ok that others can be and will think differently from you. Life would be boring if we were all clones of each other!
- Blame- People are human and do make mistakes, but saying a problem is someones fault can break down the communication. Blaming someone can feel attacking and cause them to get defensive. They will instantly stop hearing what you have to say. Instead ask them for what you need from them if a situation like this comes up again.
- Martyrdom- When someone claims to be a victim, they are blaming everyone else for their reality. Yes, things happen in our lives that are outside of our control, but we do control how we react to things. Staying in a "poor me" mentality will only keep us stuck in the negative situation. Instead try to look at yourself to see if there is anything you can do different next time to prevent the situation. Anytime we feel like a victim, we likely played a part in allowing it to happen. Assessing this can help you learn from the situation and be proactive for next time.
Check back with us tomorrow as Tamara covers more characteristics of bad communication!
Written by Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC
Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC is a licensed therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Teri enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, couples and relationship counseling. Teri also does family counseling, child counseling, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area, including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Zionsville, and Westfield.